I believe that life isn't always about love. Or being with Mr. Right.
The last few months have been the toughest life journey I had to go through. I was stuck between holding on and letting go. I was in the state of denial, where a part of me was still being hopeful that he would come back to me and we could restart everything. But even then I knew that it was impossible. Afterall, we've made it clear that we're better off as best friends instead. But just like many other girls out there, saying it out loud seems so easy, rather than to be done. Months since that and I never missed a day without thinking about him. And I thought, this would last forever because I didn't think I could love anyone as strong as my love for him.
Only until last night I suddenly realized, I was being the anchor for myself.
I was the reason I couldn't move on. I kept watering a flower that's already dead. A lot of my friends had told me to let go, but I covered my ears like a kid. Just because I was still hoping that he would come back and I didn't want to miss that chance. It took me this long to realize that there was never a chance for us to be back together. That's why, last night when I was going out with Eri and his friends, I decided to make up my mind.
It finally strikes me back that the most important thing is to see him happy, no matter what his choice is. I have a feeling that he goes back to his ex-crush before me. Which is a good thing because even at the beginning, I still want him to fight for her. And now that I'm letting go, everything feels lighter. I'm not gonna feel lonely even without him to hold my hands when I need them.
Because I've got so many friends around me. And I'm blessed to have them all.
Because life isn't always about love. Or being with Mr. Right.